Tough One

Hi to all.  I am alive and well!  But, it was a tough weekend.

So here is what has happened since my last post:  I had chemo round 4 last Wednesday, back for the Neulasta shot on Thursday, followed by some rough days over the weekend.  I was really tired (slept a lot), had a little bone pain (but not too bad), and new this time, nausea.  I thought I was going to escape nausea, but apparently not.  The good news is I was not throwing up; the bad news is I just did not feel well at all.

I am finding that it is getting harder and harder to stay positive.  But I am trying and I think doing fairly well under the circumstances.  I did have a few pity parties for myself over the weekend.  I think the toughest part for me, other than not feeling well, is “missing out”.  I am used to being active, out and about, getting things done…but post chemo, I just can’t.  It’s tough.

But I am happy to report that round 4 is over.  Two to go!  I feel so much better today than I did yesterday (and the day before).  Like previous cycles, after about three to four really bad days, I start to improve and with each day I get a little better.  My last treatment will be the end of July which is not too far away.  That is hard to believe.  But, I am so ready for this to be over!

I am spending more time these days thinking ahead to surgery.  At this point, we are targeting early September.  We have a lot of work to do between now and then.  I will be scheduling a lot of surgeon consultations over the next few weeks.  Should be interesting.




  1. Mary Johnson says:

    I am so sorry this last one was rough… only two more to go, and I know you will get through this with flying colors!!!! You are one of the strongest people I know! You WILL get through this! As always, we are here if you need us. And don’t hesitate to call if you need a good cheerleader to get you through the rough spots!!!! Constantly praying for you, as always!!!!


  2. Meredith,

    I am so sorry you had a hard time with number four…You hang in there! I know its very difficult and I was afraid you were going to “hit the wall” at number four, but know that you have a lot of people in your corner praying for you and sending you light and love. You will make it through this and you will kick it’s ass good. I know you will.

    Honestly, self-pity parties cannot be completely avoided, but having the ability to also see where that’s just wasting precious time is what will help you get through those ‘scary’ moments. I picked up some stuff at the clinic the other day for groups and if you’re interested in going to meet other survivors, I’d totally go with you. It would probably do us both good. I understand our situations are a little bit different – in the respect that I am not married and I don’t have child – but, we are “sisters” in this together. More importantly, we are survivors and we WILL make it through.

    If you need anything at all or would just like to talk, I’m around…

    Take care,

  3. lauriel says:

    i am sorry to hear about the crappy number 4. We are just a few steps away if you need anything….. even corn 😉

  4. melissa says:

    Sorry to hear about the rough go around this time. You are moving the ball forward to the end…. only 2 to go, only 2 to go only 2 to go!!!! Remember you are one tough cooke!!!

    melissa, Sean and Lydia

  5. Just happened upon your site when I was researching to see if many people had completely different side effects and patterns from one chemo to another. I just finished round 2 of my chemo. I have invasive ductal carcinoma. I am 39. I have 2 more AC and 4 Taxol chemo treatments left then 35 radiation. I will have another surgery or two left as well.

    It’s hard but writing about it makes it so much easier! Thanks for sharing and good luck as you continue on your journey.

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